Perking Up

I had my visit to the vet yesterday, and as I already knew it's just my uveitis acting up again. Don't think I'm going to tell you what that is - look it up yourself. I'm enduring those truly humiliating eye drops three times a day and enjoying my totally fabulous tunajuice treat twice a day. Yes, I do know that the fleshies are putting my pills in there, but I don't care - it's the best thing I've eaten since I liberated those prawns from the counter. I let those chumps think they're pulling one over on me, but really I'm just in it for the fish juice and I'll take the pills if I have to. Mostly I'm just doing a lot of relaxing, napping, resting, snoozing, sleeping and hanging out. You know what an expert I am at that sort of thing! Today I've been doing some trotting up and down the stairs and from window to window to watch the birds, so the peeps aren't as worried about me. I'm sure my sassy self will reassert itself any day now!

Under the Weather

Well my darlings, it looks like I'll be taking a few days break from blogging. I'm having one of my "spells" where my eyes get funny and I get all woogy and sleepy. I'm off to see the vet today. I never mind going to see the vet. She makes a HUGE fuss over me, tells me again and again how pretty I am and generally treats me like the Empress I am. I'm sure I'll be feeling much my old self soon. I hate to worry the peeps like this... I also hate those eye drops. Ooooooh, I hate them SO MUCH!

Finally!

Ahhhh, finally they have given way to my gentle persuasion! The painters didn't do the windowsills today so at 4:30 when they went home I went OUT OUT OUT. It feels sooooo good to roll around in the gravel and eat grass! Maybe I will reward the Door Opener with a snuggle tonight. Or maybe not.

Musette's Enemies List

• The painters
• Moxie
• The neighbour who hosed me last summer
• Russell Crowe
• All the squirrels in the world (I will rid the land of those little fuzzballs of evil)
• Sabex (they make Prednisolone feline eye drops...oooh, I hate them so much)
• My doppelganger from across the street
• Those hideous little white mop dogs who walk by every day with their owner (how disgusting to be an animal with an OWNER...cats would never sink to that level)
• Nestle
• The noisy crows that nest in our neighbour's trees and then divebomb me all spring

You will all get yours in time! You should be glad - very glad - that you aren't on this list. Oh it won't be pretty when those evildoers get what's coming to them!

5:25

Quick! Call the SPCA immediately. Being kept inside when I'd rather be outside is CRUEL CRUEL CRUEL. Okay painters - I've added you to my "enemies" list. You'd better watch out...

2:10

Don't let this picture fool you. I am still a tightly coiled spring ready to leap outside the second one of those dumb peeps opens the door.

12:04

I tried again to request a brief sojourn outside while the Peep was making her lunch. I very politely sat at the door and gave the gentlest of murps so she would know what I wanted. Who am I kidding? The entire time she was cooking I yowled like I was being toasted along with her english muffins and scratched the glass in the door until even my ears hurt a little. No luck though. Oh, I am MAD.

10:13

No no no no no no no. Don't those chumps know that I have PROJECTS outside that need tending to?

8:23

8:23 and I'm still not out. Not panicking yet.

PEEVED!

Oh, I am peeved beyond measure, my friends. I can't believe it either, but here it is 3:05 in the afternoon and I HAVEN'T BEEN OUTSIDE EVEN ONCE. The Door Opener says that the painters are here and I need to stay in. How extremely rude of her! I have let her know loudly and often that I'm not pleased. What does she think I'm going to do? Run away? Attack the painters? Jump up on the newly painted windowsills and make little pussy footprints all over? Use their ladders to get up to the top of the cedar tree? Hmmm...she might be right about a few of those, but mostly I just want to feel the spring sunshine on my fur as I romp around in my yard. I need to chase some bugs and have a good scratch on the palm tree. I need to secure the perimeter against Moxie (my nemesis). Perhaps hide out under the lilies or climb the cedar as high as I can and watch those sweet baby birds. Oh how I love those darling tender babies! Just thinking about...cuddling...them gives me the shivers! But today I can only watch them from behind glass which is good, but just not AS good. The Door Opener may THINK that I've settled down and resigned myself to a day of snoozing in a sunny windowseat, but even when I'm snoring I'm plotting my sweet sweet revenge...

Perhaps only a fine turdecken brunch instead of a cold can of Super Supper could make up for this day. Oh don't think I've given up on the turducken. Zephyr loves can-time and crunchies too much for a hunger strike, but we will find a way to make our statement. Hmmm...if only I could somehow get outside and get my furry little paws on some of that paint...I0 foot messages on the side of the house announcing our demand for turducken might just get some fleshy attention.

Hunger Strike

We just might have to think of a different way to bring the fleshies over to the idea of turducken. I haven't given up on the fabulous idea of a hunger strike, but Zephyr is just not cooperating. He likes the idea of turducken (who doesn't?) but then that boy likes his chow and he'll eat anything, including twist-ties, feathers, string, screws, elastic bands and lint. I'm not kidding here people...he's a garbage can with fur... So as soon as The Can Opener put down that tasty moist treat Zephyr was right in there. And if he was eating I certainly wasn't going to deprive myself! United we stand or together we snack! Zeph thinks maybe we should try snuggling and being NICE to the Peeps to get what we want. Ha! That would undermine everything I've worked so hard for here! For the love of mouse, Zephyr, when will you learn?

The Object of My Affection!

TURDUCKEN!

Have you heard about turducken? Surely this is the most wonderful culinary creation EVER. It's a CHICKEN inside a DUCK inside a TURKEY. Oh my. Certainly only the superior mind of a feline could have thought of this delicacy! I might have added a couple of baby starlings, but it sounds fabulous just the way it is. I won't rest until I've tried this carnival of carnivory. How will Zephyr and I convince the fleshies that they must provide us with sweet sweet turducken?

Hmmm...perhaps I can organize a hunger strike until the fleshies give in and get us turducken. I'll let you know how it goes.

Maybe just a nibble of kibble would be in order before we start the strike. Then...power to the KITTIES.

My Chum Zephyr

No, not chum like salmon you sillies! Chum like buddy. Friend. Comrade. The little dude. My fur brother. Hmmm...a salmon brother could be good too...

I sure do love my Zephyr, as you can see by the photo below. He's my kitty "brother" although we come from different Mamas. Nobody knows where Zephyr's Mom is (him and his sisters were rescued from the wild), so I took over the job when he came here last October. He was just a wee kitten and really scared - I liked him right away even though as a rule I'm not too pleased by other felines. First I showed him who's boss (ME) and then I taught him how to make the best of this sweet situation he's in and teach him that a skin family can be useful and fun. Someone had to show him how to train those fleshy humans to do his bidding! He may not be EMPRESS OF ALL, but as a cat he needs to claim his rights and privileges! Now he's 12 pounds of lumbering, bellyrub-loving pudge, but I still like to groom him all over, play chase with him and sleep with him in the catbed even though we don't really fit anymore.

PSYCHIC MESSAGE TO FLESHIES: new big catbed...new big catbed...new big catbed...

Snuggling with Zephyr

Last Night

Last night I decided to give the fleshies a rare treat and settled down in the girl lap for some serious snuggling action while she was watching that television thing. You've got to do that every once in awhile to make them feel good about themselves. As for me, I usually get all my needs met in bed - that's where I really like to be held and stroked. It's also really fun to demand to be the centre of attention in bed because that means that the girl and the boy can't hold each other and ignore me. I like to fit myself right in between their heads and start purring away. The poor suckers can't resist me and soon forget that they were cuddling and smooching and have to pat ME and love ME and worship ME. ME, ME, ME. The sooner they realize that it's all about ME the better we'll all get along.

In a MOOD

I'm not telling ANYONE what happened to me outside, but when I came in just now I was in a MOOD. I'm an emotional girl and I have to tell everyone and everything how I'm feeling. And how was I feeling? Hissy! Here's a list of things I've hissed at in the last 10 minutes:

• my fur brother Zephyr
• the plant in the kitchen
• the blue chair
• a coat
• Zephyr again

It's a good thing Zephy understands me. He knows that when I'm in a mood I'm not really mad at him. I'm just MAD and I have to express myself. I've had a drink and now I'm going to have some quiet time by myself on a sunny chair in the studio. I'm pretty sure I'll be feeling fabulous again soon.

My glamour shot

Ah, Spring!

What a fabulous day for the Empress. The sun is shining and I'm going in and out and in and out and in and out and in and out. The Door Opener is looking pretty peeved, but a girl wants what a girl wants, and what I want is in and out and in and out and in and out and in and out. Sometimes she doesn't want to let me in, but I have perfected the art and science of making my nails squeal on the glass door at such a pitch and intensity that I can not be ignored. What am I doing outside, you wonder? Oh, I'm watching those baby starlings in the nests in the cedar tree very carefully. Oh, those baby birds...how I want to...cuddle them...cuddle them SO VERY TIGHTLY. I love baby birds. So sweet and tender. I've been trying to climb the tree so that I can...cuddle them...right in their nest, but it's way too high up in the tree. I have yet to...cuddle...any birds at all, but I really think I'd like to. I especially think I'd like to...cuddle...those twittery juicy little babies... Mmmm. This post is making me hungry - I must go munch some kibble and then I'm off for my afternoon nap in the catbed with Zephyr. Ah, life is good.

Meet My Entourage

Why don't I begin by telling you about those who serve me? Meet The Peep With Hooters, aka The Girl, aka Door Opener. She sleeps beside Can Opener, aka The Peep With Dangly Bits, aka The Boy. And I sleep between them. At least lately I choose to do so. And they love it when I do. Honestly!

Aside from the Fleshies, I live with my fur brother, Zephyr. He's big and orange and white, and he's a little slow, if you know what I mean. I'm talking physically and mentally here, folks. Thankfully, he has me to look after him. He'd be lost without me. I tell him what to do and groom him when necessary. He's a pretty good chum, really. As long as he does what I tell him to do, nobody gets hurt.

So much to write about this house and those who dwell within. And the yard! I've got so much to say about the yard. . . but I tire. And the Peeps await upstairs, with a nice warm valley between them for me to sleep between.

First Post Postponed

I was going to write a long juicy post about my fabulous life, but it looks like it will have to wait. Ruling the Universe can really tire a girl out. Why not check out one of the best things on the web while you wait for me to finish my nap? Punk Kittens rockin' out! This is surely what the internet was made for!

Trying Things Out